Attraversiamo

So yes I am attempting another blog, as this is a new year, and I have to change to begin really living the life I deserve.  2011 I learned a lot about me, but still doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. The meeting of Insanity right? Met a lot new people in 2011, most great but a few bad eggs that are more messed up then me. Searching for answers and direction, but not really searching at all, just doing the same thing that really isn't working.

My life revolves around my pets, friends and my family ( even though I am living in a different state I am distant ) I rescue pets and even though I really can't afford it, I can't give up on the 4 dogs, 3 cats, 2 goats and 5 horses I have rescued all from pending death via euthanasia or slaughter. These pets have bankrupted me in the past year, now I am poorer then I have ever been ( horses are very costly ) . Its hard living paycheck to paycheck when I know I have so much potential.  I have my MBA after all, and am making good money, I am worth more. I need to take care of me, as Suze Orman says People first. But I am sorry Suze but do I just throw all these pets back to the feed lot or pound since I really can't afford them?  A few of my horses are going to be near impossible to place due to their age.. That isn't a choice for me. The are counting on me, I am all they have. They are my responsibility and I need to figure out how to make this work for us all... For now.. Not saying in the future I won't find homes but I won't give up on my family, my pets..

So what do I do now? Keep doing what I have been doing the last couple years and probably end up totally emotionally as well as physically bankrupt.  I am close. But I am not going to give up. I am going to use this blog to get myself out of this hole I am currently in. Get my health and weight back and my mind. I LOVE to work out, and I am not being sarcastic here.. I am just lazy and I guess depressed with all I have going on, its easier to take a nap then work out and eat right. That has to change, starting today. Sorry McDonalds but I am breaking up with you. Its been a long relationship and you are always there for me but our relationship is toxic. Not saying I might still see you on occasion for now if I have to eat out going to do a healthier route. Subway FTW ( even though damn you for endorsing Michael Vick, but we all make mistakes and deserve a second chance ), and other healthier eating out venues will be my mission.

So that is all I have to say for now I guess. Its 1230am and I should be in bed as I have to be up at 8:30.. Time to focus on my home this week, eating right and back to exercising. I have so many plans, I have so much potential. Maybe putting it out for the world to see will help me in my journey? Attraversiamo is about crossing over and I am now on a journey to make myself, and my family of pets a new life....

So stay tuned for my next blog, my goal is to blog daily- And I think that is a goal I can make. By putting this out hopefully I will have followers that will hold me accountable for my journey... I have so many great friends and people who care about me.  We all need help right? Well I am signing off of my first blog entry for 2012.. Heres to healthy thinking and living, doing it one day at a time...